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Topics - angelamo

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Tell us your favorite Joke / Banned from Store
« on: July 24, 2009, 10:42:22 PM »
Dear Mrs. Murray,

Whilst we would like to thank you for your valued custom and use of the Tesco Loyalty Card, the Manager of our store in Banbury is considering banning you and your family from shopping with us, unless your
husband stops his antics.

Below is a list of his actions over the past few months all verified by our surveillance cameras:

1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's trolleys when they weren't looking.

2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to feminine products aisle.

4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares.. .... and watched what happened.

5. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

6. September 15: Set up a tent in the outdoor clothing department and told shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring sausages and a Calorgas stove.

7. September 23: When the Deputy Manager asked if she could help him, he began to cry and asked, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'

8.. October 4: Looked right into the security camera; used it as a mirror, picked his nose, and ate it.

9. October 10: While appearing to be choosing kitchen knives in the Housewares aisle asked an assistant if he knew where the antidepressants were.

10. November 3: Darted around the store suspiciously, loudly humming the Mission Impossible' theme.

11.November 6: In the kitchenware aisle, practised the 'Madonna look' using different size funnels.

12. November 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed, yelled' PICK ME!' 'PICK ME!'

13. November 21: When an announcement came over the loudspeaker, assumed the foetal position and screamed 'NO! NO! It's those voices again.'

And; last, but not least:

14. November 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited a while; then yelled, very loudly, 'There is no toilet paper in here.'

National News / Gunman, Guards Exchange Fire at Nat. Holocaust Museum
« on: June 10, 2009, 08:43:26 PM »
By NAFEESA SYEED, Associated Press Writer Nafeesa Syeed, Associated Press Writer – 21 mins ago    WASHINGTON – An elderly gunman opened fire with a rifle inside the crowded U.S. Holocaust Memorial Museum on Wednesday, gravely wounding a security guard before being shot. Authorities said they were investigating a white supremacist as the possible shooter.
The assailant was in critical condition, said Washington, D.C., Mayor Adrian Fenty.
D.C. Police Chief Kathy Lanier said the gunman appeared to have acted alone. He was "engaged by security guards immediately after entering the door" with a rifle, she said. The museum normally has a heavy security presence with guards positioned both inside and outside. All visitors are required to pass through metal detectors at the entrance, and bags are screened. But Lanier told reporters at a hastily convened news conference, "The second he stepped into the building he began firing."
Authorities said they were investigating for any possible connection with terrorism or hate crime.
The museum, located just off the National Mall near the Washington Monument, is a popular tourist attraction. It draws about 1.7 million visitors each year. Roads surrounding the museum were closed at least temporarily and blocked off with yellow tape. Several police cars and officers on horses surrounded the area.
One law enforcement official said James Von Brunn, a white supremacist, was under investigation in the shooting, and a second official said the elderly man's car was found near the museum and tested for explosives. They spoke on condition of anonymity, saying they were not authorized to discuss the investigation.
Infuriates me!

Tell us your favorite Joke / So This Frog Walks Into A...
« on: May 15, 2009, 01:45:33 PM »
A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see from her nameplate that her name is Patricia Whack.

"Miss Whack, I'd like to get a $30,000 loan to take a holiday."

Patty looks at the frog in disbelief and asks his name. The frog says his name is Kermit Jagger, his dad is Mick Jagger, and that it's okay, he knows the bank manager.

Patty explains that he will need to secure the loan with some collateral.

The frog says, "Sure. I have this," and produces a tiny porcelain elephant, about an inch tall, bright pink and perfectly  formed.

Very confused, Patty explains that she'll have to consult with the bank manager and disappears into a back office.

She finds the manager and says, "There's a frog called Kermit Jagger out there who claims to know you and wants to borrow $30,000, and he wants to use this as collateral."

She holds up the tiny pink elephant. "I mean, what in the world is this?"

(folks, you're gonna luv this)

The bank manager looks back at her and says...

"It's a knickknack, Patty Whack. Give the frog a loan, His old man's a Rolling Stone[/]




Tell us your favorite Joke / Financial Planning
« on: April 29, 2009, 08:28:56 PM »
This came in an email. Too funny.
Dan was a single guy living at home with his father and working in the family business.  When he found out he was going to inherit a fortune when his sickly father died, he decided he needed a wife with which to share his fortune.  One evening at an investment meeting he spotted the most beautiful woman he had ever seen.  Her natural beauty took his breath away.

"I may look like just an ordinary man," he said to her, "but in just a few years, my father will die, and I'll inherit $200 million."  Impressed, the woman obtained his business card and three days later, she became his stepmother.

Women are so much better at financial planning than men.

Gardening / Blackberries
« on: April 24, 2009, 03:01:55 PM »
How difficult are they? What do they need to thrive?
I was thinking about planting them in a box type container and using the thornless variety. They would get a great deal of full sunlight in the location that I am thinking of.

Tell us your favorite Joke / Acts 2:38
« on: January 27, 2009, 11:49:57 PM »
A woman had just returned to her home from church, when she was startled by an intruder. She caught the man in the
Act of robbing her home of its valuables and yelled:
'Stop!  Acts 2:38!'
(Repent and be Baptized, in the name of Jesus Christ, so that your sins may be forgiven.)

The burglar stopped in his tracks.
The woman calmly called the police and explained what she had done.

As the officer cuffed the man to take him in, he asked the burglar:
'Why did you just stand there?
All the old lady did was yell a scripture to You.'

'Scripture?' replied the burglar.
'She said she had an Ax and Two 38s!'

Tell us your favorite Joke / Adam and Eve
« on: November 18, 2008, 08:45:44 PM »
Sharing, it might be old to you, but I just read it. :)
One day in the Garden of Eden, Eve calls to God. “Lord, I have a problem!”
“What’s the problem, Eve”?
“Lord, I know you created me and provided this beautiful garden and all these wonderful animals and that hilarious comedic snake, but I’m just not happy.”
“Why is that, Eve”?, the reply came from above.
“Lord, I am lonely, and I’m sick to death of apples.”
Well, Eve, in that case, I have a solution. I shall create a man for you.”
“What’s a man, Lord?”
“This man will be a flawed creature, with many bad traits. He’ll lie, cheat and be vainglorious; all in all, he’ll give you a hard time. But….he’ll be bigger, faster, and will like to hunt and kill things. He will look silly at times, but will be a companion.  He will be witless and will revel in childish things like fighting and kicking a ball. He won’t be too smart, so he’ll also need your advice to think properly.”
“Sounds great,” says Eve, with an ironically raised eyebrow. “What’s the catch, Lord”?
“Well…you can have him on one condition”.
“What’s that, Lord”?
“As I said, he’ll be proud, arrogant and self-admiring…so you’ll have to let him believe that I made him first.  Just remember, it’s our little secret….woman to woman”!!!

Religion Opinion / The Interview with God
« on: October 04, 2008, 02:21:31 PM »
Don't know if this has been posted...but had to share. Absolutely beautiful.

Religion Opinion / Finding Faith?
« on: October 01, 2008, 03:58:35 PM »
Ok. From a post on another thread, I thought it might be nice to have a separate thread where we could share how we found our current religious beliefs. What is your story?
Please keep this NICE. No disparaging comments or trying to recruit people here! All religions welcome.

Things that make you go HMMMM / Avatar Q's
« on: September 05, 2008, 01:55:46 AM »
Why did you choose your avatar? Do you change your avatar?
 ;D  Stimulating this should be under Pulaski Enquirer...cause this enquiring mind wants to know!

Pulaski Enquirer / When Do You Start Christmas Shopping?
« on: August 26, 2008, 01:10:03 AM »
I always start SUPER early...then I'm done when the whole Christmas rush thing happens and I can just relax and enjoy the Holidays with my family and focus on true Christmas spirit. In fact...I already picked out some things from a couple of catalogs to order in the next month or so.
So when do you start?

Things that make you go HMMMM / PCW Who's Online
« on: June 25, 2008, 10:36:29 PM »
Does anyone ever check to see what the other people on the board are doing? I never used to do this, but over the last week or so, I catch myself going...hmmmm...I wonder what so and so is looking at. LOL
Oh...and JT - I saw you watching us. LOL

Gardening / Hwy 7 Swap Meet
« on: June 24, 2008, 03:59:03 PM »
Just saw this on RollaNet and thought some might be interested. :)
NEW!!!!! Black's swap meet NEW!!!!! Hwy 7 & I-44 Swap meet Exit 150 off I-44 Visible from I-44[/color] BUY -- SELL -- TRADE-- LOOK -- OR JUST VISIT Bring your birds - Small Aminals - Crafts- Collectiables -General Merchandice - Tools - Clothes -Household Items - Ect. All animals must be proprely contained. No Horses, Cattle, Swine, Sheep or goats Buyers Free Entrance & Parking open 7am Till 7pm Saturdays and Sundays. No food or drink concession booths without prior approval.Porta potties on site. All merchandice brought in by the sellers and not sold must be taken out by the sellers... No Dumping or Trashing sites.Inappropriate behavior will not be tolerated
Not responsible for accidents - Damage- lost or stolen property
Info Call 573-528-6819

Gardening / Mini Orchard?
« on: June 20, 2008, 02:42:18 AM »
Ok. I need a reality check.  ;D  I think it would be wonderful to have 6-8 fruit trees. But I've never had them before, so I don't know what work is involved. Can you share your experiences? Also, are they very sensitive to disturbances (like the dogs) - perhaps I could put up a barrier of some sort, without fencing in the orchard area? Something that fits around the base of the trees...?
Can't wait to read your posts. :)

Religion Opinion / Sacred Texts Website
« on: May 28, 2008, 10:21:16 PM »
Just wanted to share...

Religion Opinion / Is Ecumenism Possible?
« on: May 27, 2008, 04:04:43 PM »
I mean as a bringing together of Christian denominations? Your thoughts? :)

Things that make you go HMMMM / How much of your life?
« on: April 12, 2008, 04:43:13 PM »
Have you spent here on PCW? LOL If there is a thread dedicated to this, just let me know. :)
So far, I've spent nearly 4 days!! Oh my!! LOL

Gardening / Wide Rows?
« on: April 12, 2008, 03:12:38 PM »
Who uses the wide row method for planting? I read about this last night in my Country Wisdom and it makes a strong case for wide row planting instead of regular sized rows. Got me wondering who uses it here. :)

Gardening / Planting Time?
« on: April 08, 2008, 01:26:55 AM »
Is it safe to plant outdoors?

Things that make you go HMMMM / Friendship Critter
« on: March 07, 2008, 02:04:02 PM »
Thought this was too cute. Had to share.

[attachment deleted by admin]

Things that make you go HMMMM / White Stag in Scotland
« on: February 13, 2008, 05:23:59 PM »

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